Feast of the least: James Madison makes a seat at

• Ryan McGee, ESPN Senior Citizen WriterNov 22, 2023, 06:50 AM ET Close Senior writer for ESPN The Publication and ESPN.com 2-time Sports Emmy winner

• 2010, 2014 NMPA Author of the Year

Inspirational idea of the week:

I have actually got eyes to see with
Ears to hear with
Arms to hug with
Lips to kiss with
Someone to love

How might any person request for more?My requirements are small, I buy ’em all
At the five and ten cent store
Oh, I’ve got plenty to be glad for

— Bing Crosby, “I’ve Got Plenty to Be Glad For”

Here at Bottom 10 Headquarters, situated in the back of the airplane Jesse Palmer resides in as he jets in between college football games and the 37 reality reveals he hosts, we never ever pass up a chance to express how grateful we are.Thankful for the likes of R.O.C.K. in the U-T-S-A, Georgia State Not Southern, the New Mexico State Other Aggies, Arkansaw State and unLv, all of which were fighting for Bottom 10 titles apparently just a couple of minutes ago now are all going bowling and some are defending conference titles. They all seem like that surprisingly fantastic Thanksgiving meal, the casserole prepared by that weird hippie your cousin married after they met at a furry convention. She slow-cooked a bunch of random components that no one thought would work but it is absolutely tasty, specifically when it lastly discovers its way into a bowl.But we are likewise grateful for those teams which are still with us. The ones which have actually never forgotten their Bottom 10 roots and are held down by those roots as if they were battleship chains. On the Turkey Day table they are the thing your Uncle Lonnie discovered in the back of his ice box, kept in a recycled Nation Crockery tub and identified just with a scribbled blue magic marker, illegibly specifying that it is either a “donut treat”or cautioning” do not eat.”It smells odd. It’s method too brown. But hey, it’s Thanksgiving and ol’ Lonnie, he might use a win. As might we all.With apologies to Uncle Lonnie, SMU tight end Lonnie Johnson, Georgia Southern D-lineman Lonnie Leverette, Western Kentucky linebacker Lonnie

Rice and Steve Harvey, here’s the Week 13 Bottom 10. 1. State of Kent(1-10 )Nick Saban

‘s university ended up being the nation’s first 10-loss group by means of its 34-3 nail-biter at Baller State. Now the Golden Flashes host Northern Ill-ugh-noise as a 19-point home pet. In associated news, my home pet is anticipated to acquire 19 pounds Thursday as I secretly feed her the”donut treat” under the Thanksgiving table. 2. ULM(noticable ‘UHLM’)(2-9 )Ulm, the Warhawks have run their, ulm, losing streak to nine games after, ulm, beginning the year 2-0. Now they, ulm, take a trip down to Louisiana not Louisiana-Monroe for, ulm, the Fight of the Bayou, which, ulm, if ulm, I indicate, er, I’m being truthful, I didn’t know was called that up until just, ulm, now.

3. Akronmonious(2-9 )Fun truth: Before Terry Bowden took the job at ULM he was the head coach at Akron. Which isn’t really an enjoyable truth unless you are the pharmacist offering Bowden his ulcer medications.

4. UCan’t( 2-9 )The Huskies have actually made a late run back to their once-familiar bottom rung of these rankings thanks to a pair of losses by a combined rating of 103-9. Not even a confessional cubicle date 31-3 triumph over Sacred Heart was enough to move them out of the top/bottom 3, nor was it enough to prevent us identifying their match this weekend as the New England Wicked Smaht Pillow Fight of Da Freaking Week. Against who? Or whom? Or whomever? Keep reading …

5. James, mad as … son(10-1)Sources inform Bottom 10 JortsCenter that James Madison officials are now petitioning the NCAA to alter its laws to state any overtime loss in your home on the exact same day you’ve just hosted College GameDay and gotten everyone all lathered as much as support your initial NCAA petition to get a bowl berth doesn’t count.

6. Van-duh-bilt Commode Doors( 2-9) Fortunately is Vandy lastly avoided a loss in the midst of its nine-game losing streak. The problem is it’s only because it had a bye week. The even worse news is it still didn’t cover the spread.

7. No-vada(2-9 )The Woof Load opened the season 0-6. Then they won two in a row. Now they have actually lost three directly. It’s the very best roller rollercoaster in the state this side of the one bolted to the top of the Stratosphere in Vegas that continuously looks like it will fall off and land in the middle of Circus Circus.

8. Sam Houston, we have a problem( 2-9)The Bearkats rekonnected with their krummy outkomes by kurbing a konsectuive wins streak kompliments of a loss to Konference-USA kompetitor Western Kentucky. They have only one kontest staying on their kalendar. That’s kool with me bekause this replacing c’s with k’s konceit has been kinda overkooked for weeks.

9. EC-Yew(2-9) East Carolina lost to Navy 10-0, marking the first time an ECU team was held scoreless in 26 years, but certainly not the very first time a group of Carolina-based pirates were captured off guard by the Navy. Sorry, Blackbeard, too soon?

10. UMess (3-8) The Minuetmen go back to these rankings after a long in-season lack and in the nick of time for that New England Wicked Smaht Pillow Fight of Da Freaking Week we teased earlier, against their old buddies from down Path 32, UConn. UMass opened the season with a win over New Mexico State and then followed that with a 45-point loss to Auburn. But New Mexico State simply squashed Auburn 31-10. So, naturally, if UMass beats UConn then they need to play Auburn, who is coached by Hugh Freeze, who left Liberty last year and Liberty is the team that just beat UMass. Can I get a thumbs up? Preferably from a press box hospital bed?Waiting list

: San Diego Stank, Southern Missed, Residing On Tulsa Time, Temple of Doom, Charlotte 3-and-8ers, covering sweet potatoes with walnuts.